So I slept a bit better last night.

My head is still fucked. I'm quite sure it will be for a while but I'm trying to change my outlook on things. I'm trying to be positive.

Why can't I just dislike or hate someone?

If it was my Aunty Janet I'd be fine. I don't care how much bad karma crap it brings I want that bitch dead. I hate her with every inch of my body... and I have a lot of inches (fnarr fnarr!)

See, even I can make jokes when I'm in the mood!

No, right now, there is no light at the end of a tunnel, not even the proverbial train coming to run me over. If there was a train approaching then problems would be over and done with and that would just be too simple.

My mother arrives at 5.30pm. I doubt I can keep this from her but I have to. For her sake, as well as mine. Sounds dramatic I know but it's just the truth.

I could really do with not feeling like this tomorrow. How I felt on my birthday is insignificant compared to tomorrow. I want to go to bed tonight and wake up on Thursday. My mood needs to improve drastically and quickly ready for the 4th,

I apologise for writing depressive posts. It's not something I like doing but essentially this is my blog and I'll write what I want. If you don't like it, don't read it. At least I don't do it all the time.