Best viewed at www.iamlanders.com

Happy Birthday Chyna

Happy Birthday Sarah

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/6970368.stm

1. I'm still getting fucking spam!
2. I'm NOT getting blog comment notifications!

CUNT!

I'm blogging this now as I doubt I'll be able to do it Saturday but...

Saturday... the 1st of September...

Bloscars count down begins...

Last time saw this...

Want to know more?

Stay tuned....

Sort the fucking spammers out!

Bastard sick of it now!

This picture of George Bush by Jonathan Yeo is made out of porn pictures.

Nice.

RIP Hilly Kristal.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/ukrobp/1256829239/

I vowed I'd never sign up and I honestly could not tell you why. But I have.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/ukrobp/

There is something very relaxing and theraputic about sitting on a camping chair on the top of our mountain flying a kite. It appears to have banished all the "my leg is fucking killing me" feelings.

Been playing Age of Mythology (because it means I can sit down and not have to fucking move) and after I'd won I checked the post match stats.

How can the enemy have built 151 units yet I destroyed 215?

Where did the extra 64 come from?

Right, I'm going to hobble to the front gate and see if we've got any post. I know there's an Avon catalogue in there so I might have a flick through that. Then I'm going to make myself comfy (which will be a bloody miracle) and get ready to watch Dr. Who & The Darleks!

TTFN x

I'm not going.

I'm going to sit at home.

I shall use this time productively though.

I shall teach myself CSS.

Elliot and Liz (Brads brother and the lady he's "steppin' out" with) are down for the bank holiday weekend and want to go to the beach.

Now I'm supposed to be resting my leg and this morning, while giving myself a wash, I decided I wasn't going to go.

But now I want to.

But then I also think I should be sat here.

Gah!

Imagine you are on your deathbed. Recommend to those who remain in your life...

1) One book to read.
House of Leaves - Mark Z. Danielewski

2) One movie to watch.
Rebecca

3) One food to eat.
Anything chinese.

4) One place to go.
Galway

5) One life lesson to leave behind.
Regret nothing.

Watch it all...

Don't give up on it...

WOW!

Well the doc assessed me and said that I haven't broken a bone and my Achilles tendon is in tact.

No! Really! I already knew that last night!

But then he pointed out an interesting "dark" spot on the x-ray around the then tendon.

So, I shall have this lovely cast on until the 11th. He wanted to make it the 14th but that's the day we move to Ireland!

On the 11th they'll remove the cast and decide if I need another cast.

I have been warned to expect to be in a cast for the next six to eight weeks.

JOY JOY JOY!!!

One of the worst things about it is the way my leg has been set. Because the tendon needs to repair I've had to have it set at an angle (as shown) which means I can't actually put my foot flat on the floor.

BASTARD!

- Arrived at A&E.

- Waited.

- Asked for pain killers just as a dead guy arrives in an ambulance.

- Waited.

- Finally got taken to a cubicle.

- Jnr Doc messed with leg. Was very nice.

- Snr Doc messed with leg. Was HORRID! Hurt me a lot!

- Mutter something about damaged tendons.

- Off to X-ray.

- X-Ray woman made me flatten my leg... which I couldn't do... it hurt.... a lot ... I called her a bitch! - then apologised.

- Back to cubicle.

- Jnr Doc says I need a cast.

- Cast lady comes in. Puts bright red cast on.

- Sent home with an appointment at fracture clinic tomorrow. Still in pain but it's eased off a lot but I think thats the pain killers.

- Thank you to all the well-wishers etc. Thank you x

Yes folks, once again I'm off to hospital!

While drying up I reached up to a high cupboard to put a big bowl away ...

I stretched...

Stretched some more...

N e a r l y t h e r e . . .

SNAP goes something in my ankle!

No idea what but currently I'm sat on the sofa awaiting a lift. I can't put any weight on my my right leg, can't straighten it out and can't let anyone (Brad) touch it!

I have swallowed back vomit twice and had tears in my eyes thrice.

Joy joy joy!

I'm in so much fucking pain!

... teach sign language!

If I was to have my own domain* name based around Landers what would you suggest?

*Just in case you don't know - and yes there are some that don't - a domain name is the web address - like blog.co.uk but mine would be something.ie

Why am I constantly waking up early?

If I don't wake up at bastard o'clock like most mornings them I'm wide awake by stupid o'clock. Had a late night last night and that didn't help.

Bah!

H A P P Y

B I R T H D A Y

S K E T C H W E A S E L

Surely this is more than just bush?

Clicky Clicky

I want to learn about CSS but cannot learn online!

I need a teacher!

Poo!

Five years ago today, around 7.30pm, I got in my car to head into Birmingham for a meeting at 8pm.

I left the house and as I pulled on to the motorway all I saw was brake lights suddenly coming on. Too late to change direction I carried on hoping that it would soon move on.

My phone rang and it was one of my bosses.

“There’s been an accident on the 42, a coach or something, your house is only five minutes away from the scene. Can you get down there and take some pictures and have your phone ready to go on air if need be,” blurted the voice before I could say much.
“Erm… no,” I replied.
“What?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I’m on my way out.”
“But…”
“No.”
“Is it somewhere special?”
“It’s a date.”
“Oh come on, just do this and you can meet your date later.”
“No. I’m already going to be late because of this accident, I’m already on the 42 and stuck in the traffic caused by it.”
“If you’re already on the 42 you can do it!”
“I have no camera.”
“Well at least go and find out what’s going on and be on stand-by!”
“No. Goodbye”

Sat there in the traffic I sent a text…

Am stuck in traffic. Will be about 30mins late. Sorry.

The reply came…

Am stuck on bus. Will be about 30mins late. Sorry.

Fate, it would appear, had made us both late.

It turned out the coach accident was in-between the exit and entrance of junction 10 so the police we directing people off the motorway, around the island, then back on to the motorway.

Around 8.30pm, 30 minutes late, I walked into the bar and sat there, all on his own but with two pints, was Brad.

He looked lovely.

We spent the night chatting about many different things.

I spent the night staring at the fag machine as I was on one of my (now successful) ”I’m going to quit smoking” drives.

At 11.30pm as we left the pub I offered him a lift home, which he accepted.

We pulled up outside his place and he asked me in for coffee.

Seven coffees later saw us at 5am and time for me to go home. And yes, it was seven coffees… and nothing else! (I mean that in a good way as I’d been given orders from a friend not to hop on the good foot and do the bad thing for at least two weeks!)

I said goodbye, said I’d call him and left.

A few minutes later (and he’ll deny this!) I got a text…

You didn’t have to leave

I replied with…

I’ve not got far, I could come back.

He replied with…

One ring me when you’re outside and I’ll come down and let you in.

He lived in a flat above his cousin’s nursery at the time, hence the coming down and letting me in.

I stayed over that night… nothing happened… but suffice to say the rest is history.

Until we moved to Wales in the August of the following year we spent only two nights apart and both of those were in the first four weeks of being together.

Happy anniversary Brad.

I love you.

My favourite kids programmes.

MY FAVOURITE!
Oh why why why did they never come and recruit me?

H A P P Y

B I R T H D A Y

N A U G H T Y

Only click the image below when you're prepared for male nudity!

You have been warned!

Remember my new car?...

Well...

Here is my Brad's new car...

My car had a baby!

"His & Hers 4x4's" It's in the in darling.

We decided not to take Brad's car to Ireland with us. We were just going to sell it.

But... the more I thought about the more I wanted him to take a car over.

But... his car is off the road and it's not worth fixing.

So... I've been looking for something small and compact but nice an good for him.

Now... daddy buys and sells cars but as he wants to teach his son (me) a lesson he rarely gives money off or lets pay in instalments for nice bigger cars that I can afford.

So... I buy the local paper and find a car. Agree to go and see it at 3pm.

Then... I ring daddy and tell him about it to get his opinion.

He... said "Give me the money and I'll help you rip it! Big waste of money! You should have the little thing I've got on the drive!"

But... you said I couldn't pay installments! Arrrgghhhh

So... after conversations back and forth and going mental at him on the phone it's finally a done deal and we're travelling up to Birmingham tonight to go and get Brad's shiny new Vitara.

H A P P Y

B I R T H D A Y

S W E E T Y M O N

Thank you for all the fantastic questions. It was really difficult to choose just five... so I didn't. I've chosen all of them! Just this once, as it's the first time... and I've got an announcement to make... which will come in the next blog entry!

Chyna_Doll - Have you been living in Wales all your life?
No. We moved here around five years ago.

Juzzzy - In the words of the truly wonderful Michael Bolton (who looked much better with a mullet, by the way): "How am I supposed to live without you?"
You'll cope.

sallyontour - What's your most embarrassing moment ever?
Hmm... difficult one... there are so many moments that just choosing one is a challenge. I think being caught in an ex's house, by the ex, having sex with his ex as we both had keys to his place and had no where else to go at the time comes quite high on the list of moments.

ladee-bird - Would you & Brad like to have children one day? If so would you adopt OR look for a surrogate mother?
I'd love to have kids and would rather use a surrogate. It's not something we've planned though so fostering is good enough, and with fostering we get to give a multitude of kids a home rather than just one.

HektorRevisited - Is there anything you wish you had done differently (I'm not talking specifically about something you regret), if so what is it and what would you have done differently?
I wish I'd got my determination back when given the all clear. - I know that makes no sense to most but it does to me.
I wish I'd never started smoking.

HektorRevisited - What would your Otter name be and why?
I think I'd rather a name as important as my Otter name should be bestowed upon me, rather than me choosing it.

TheMusingsOfAMenopausalMama - You've had a woman and you've had a man. What's the difference? I once asked this question to a feller that had been married, divorced and then came out of the closet. I can't even remember what his response was so I figure it couldn't have been very good. I ask this I am ever so curious as to understand people and their lives.
Well I could be crude and say there is a couple of quite obvious differences but that doesn't really answer the question. To be honest it's difficult to answer. Personally it's the physique of a man that attracts me. I don't mean solid bodies, I just mean that it's a man... and not just in the mummy/daddy department. I find women attractive and can look at lady in the street or on the telly and think she is beautiful but they just don't do it for me. To me, there is nothing like a handsome man to get the engine going.

Naughty - em, what's your favourite sexual position? (I'm feeling rather fruity this afternoon)
I have a few. Doggie is always fun. The rest I shall leave to your imagination.

annameenamoon - What would be your first 5 questions at your local speed dating meet?
1. Hairy or smooth?
2. What is your favourite musical era?
3. The word "Lady". Is it song by Moloko, a reference to females, or a term of endearment for your male friends, or all of the above?
4. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy - Time will show this programme to be a classic, rejuvenated through-out the viewing eras, remade with special "just married" and "Straight Eye for the Gay Guy" episode... or... Complete tosh that should never be allowed to grace our screens ever again and all old films should be destroyed and the remains locked away in the same coffin as Gok Wan?
5. Which four well known people from any era would have like to have to dinner?

Chyna_Doll - Do you have any talents?
I can play the piano and guitar and drums a little. I have feet like hands according to Affleck.
No. I don't.

Juzzzy - Why am I great?
Because you're delusional.

boredrich - as we are all fans/haters of B.B. which B.B. house mate do you most resemble character wise and why? ok I know its not a good question but its early in the morning and I cant concentrate
I think it's a perfectly good question. If I'm honest I think I'm a mixture of Charley (from this B.B.), Brain Dowling and Shabazz.

Naughty - Brad said you have a thing about your belly button... but he won't say what cause he says you kill him. Sooooo what thing do you have about your belly button?
If you put your finger in my belly button I piss myself. I don't mean that as in I start laughing, I mean it quite literally. I literally piss myself if something pokes me in my belly button.

rowtheboat - What scares you?
Answering the previous question.

rowtheboat - And, if you ruled a planet, which one would it be, why and what would be your first law?
If I ruled a planet it would be this one as it's the only inhabited one I know. My first law would be that everyone must do as I say!

SketchWeasel - Where is the most unusual place you and Brad have had sex? Fruity enough for you dear? - LOL!
As the question includes Brad I don't want to answer - as I'm not with him at the moment and don't know how he'd feel about me answering it - so I shall give the most unusual place I've had sex with someone else... a traffic island I suppose.

idontknowwhy - have you ever had an STI?
No.

idontknowwhy - what's your most embarrassing CD?
Vanilla - No Way No Way

idontknowwhy - what is your best memory?
The events of August 15th 2006

idontknowwhy - if you could shag anyone in the world (brad excluded) who would it be?
How am I meant to choose just one? Erm... Ben Affleck... no... Nigel Harman... no... Ewan McGregor!
All of them!

HektorRevisited - Ben Affleck would, would you? Deny the existence of Spain, that is.
No.

nultygoestopartick - What are you going to be when you grow up?
Older.

beautiful_mistake - have you ever made a blue movie?
Yes.

Scrooge - Who do you aspire to be? And is it possible to empathise with a lion, do animals show feelings and have emotions like us?
I aspire to be as successful as my father, as beautiful as my mother and as loving as Brad.
Animals, such as a lion, do have feels like us yes and do show their emotions in similar ways to us. And yes I think it is possible to empathise with them

http://sco.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page

I AM
91%
OPTIMUS PRIMETake the Transformers Quiz

I like the idea of this but not sure if I actually like it.

Remember this..

As if I'm gonna let you forget...

Anyhoo... here is what has been chosen so far and who did choosed it!

Feel free to click on the link above and add your date.

January
1. Shut The Hell Up I Have A Hangover Day - Abilene
2. I've Already Forgotten My Resolutions Day - Juzzzy
12.A day when Yoda to speak like, yes? - CJ592
21. National Dont Forget It's Your Other Halfs Birthday (also see 25th) - Steve_p
25. National Dont Forget It's Your Other Halfs Birthday (also see 21st) - Steve_p

February
9. Celebrate Victorian Values and Send Your Kid Up a Chimney Day - CJ592
22. Drink Like A Piscean Fish Day - RowTheBoat
26. National Pudding and Pie day - MKFunky
28. Quespthorne Goose Day - HektorReviited

March
3. Let's Boot Them Up the Pie-Hole Day - TheMusingsOfAMenopausalMama
10. Wear a poncho to work day - HektorRevisited
11. Give All Your Money To Someone Called Sally Day - SallyOnTour
12. National Mousemat Appreciation Day - BlogLikesIt
18. National Nookie Day - RowTheBoat
19. Sir Kenneth's official birthday - HektorRevisited
24. Lets all get pissed & down on our knees to worship Ladee B day! - Ladee-Bird

April
2. Global Hit A Wanker Day - RowTheBoat
22. Lose the Plot day - Tentativeplotfinder

May
1. Stop using mobile phones day - XanderShaw
4. Star Wars Day - XanderShaw
8. Anniversary Day - BoredRich
21. National Dicks Day - BoredRich
25. National Love Making (at least 4 times a night)Day - AndrewsBlog
26. All Praise he Who is Chrisglos/Good Deeds Day - ChrisGlos

June
1. Swear Like A Trooper Day - LandersUK
3. Speak in RP day - maddogsandenglishmen
5. If It Moves Fondle It Day - whereloveis
10. World Otter Day - HektorRevisited
29. idontknowwhy she was born today Day - idontknowwhy

July
11. Kiss a squirrel day - CJ592
14. National Tankard Appreciation Day - LandersUK
24. Why Don't You, Just switch of your television set and, go and do something less boring instead day - ChrisGlos
28. Blogging For Amy Day - HektorRevisited

August
15. Awa odri (fools day) - lledeb
16. Milwauke Irish festival - lledeb
17. Pretty Dress and Mocktail Day - Sweetymon
20. National Being Naughty Day - Naughty
21. National national day day - BlogLikesIt
22. Share a Spliff with Sketchweasel Day/Buy me beer/cake/presents day - Sketchweasel
26. Festival of the hungry ghosts in China - lledeb
29. National Don't Park In a Parent And Child Space If You Do Not Have a Fooking Child With You Day - Steve_p
31. Day of Chyna - Chyna Doll

September
1. Don't Piss Me Off Day, Yeah Just Don't Piss Me Off, Even If I'm Already Pissed Off, Just Don't Do It Day - GordonsBlog
2. Joust of the Saracen Arezzo - lledeb
8. National literacy day - lledeb
11. National coming out day - lledeb
12. Spank Day (Virtual Or Otherwise! - Go to a blog - spank it!) - Abilene
14. National Try to Lick Your Elbow Day - BlogLikesIt
29. International decorate your nipple competition - CJ592

October
1. One Free Bitchslap to Anyone Annoying Day - ChrisGlos
5. National Highlighter Sniffing Day - BlogLikesIt
10. Adopt a Pineapple Day - CJ592
15. National food day - lledeb
25. Free The Beaver Day - idontknowwhy
28. Exaltation of the Shellfish - lledeb

November
1. Happy Happy Joy Joy Day - Subville
11. Quiet act of kindness day. - Abilene
18. Smell Some Cheese Day - idontknowwhy

December
5. Saint Justins Day - Juzzzy
6. Be Excellent to Each Other Day - BlogLikesIt
24. Santa is on his way
25. CHRISTMAS DAY! Woo hoo!
26. Boxing day - lets all play with boxes!
31. New Years Eve! Woot!

In other news...

Well Brad and I have just got back from seeing Transformers.

I was suitable impressed but I do have a few issues with it.

No.1. The Glasses.
When Sam had them they were normal size, as glasses should be. When Optimus picked them they were bigger. Not hugely but big enough that it made an obvious difference.

No.2. The Motorbike Slide
Come off a motorbike at high speed and you'll lose skin. Having worked in the medical field I know and have seen the damage done. At 30mph you'll be down to the bone in 3 seconds. So, how can Joshua Duhamel slide his motorbike into the ground and then just glide along gracefully on his back shooting is gun. Artistic license will only go so far Mr. Bay.

No.3. Continuity
This is something that quite often pisses me off in films. When you make a blockbuster it doesn't take a lot to employ a continuity editor. Doughnuts & Landlines to name but two!

There was something else that bugged but I can't think what it was now.

Picked up a Chinese on the way. Brad wasn't too impressed but I thought he was okay.

Right. Off to kick some ass in Age of Mythology.

Today we have our final meeting with our social worker.
On Saturday our last ever foster child* arrives, just for the weekend.

This is it!

It's really happening!

We are really moving.

Never thought it would actually come off!

30 days to go!

If any of you lot are about please feel fee to come out for TTFN drinkies in Neath on September 7th.

*Until we begin fostering again in Ireland in a few years

The building shook, pictures rattled, alarms are still going off.

There is pandemonium on the Hight Street. The opticians window has shattered and a water main has burst!

Okay so I'm talking bollocks. Or rather I'm trying to fool you.

Why?

Because it's Awa Odri.

Well it is in Japan.

According to Mr. lledeb. anyway.

Awa Odri, celebrated on August 15th, is Japan's version of our very own April Fool.

For this and many more dates why not go here (clicky clicky).

Oh and why not promote that entry by stealing both buttons on the right and putting them on your blog. Obviously I'm doing this for the greater good and not to make myself more popular!

TEN FIRSTS
First best friend: Ashley Middleton
First screen name: 100117,3267 (hey, it was on compuserve, ok?)
First Pet: Twiggy the dog..
First Piercing: Right ear. Done by my cousin. With a dirty drawing pin!
First Crush: Captain Kirk
First Record: Remember You’re a Womble
First Car: VW Beetle – TEA 301L
First Love: Wicksie
First stuffed animal: Smotin, my little white bear. I was 16

NINE LASTS
Last alcoholic beverage: White wine
Last car ride: Home to work.
Last movie seen: In the cinema, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix; on DVD, Number 23; on television, Strange Days.
Last phone call made: To Sam
Last CD Played: Jokomo.
Last Bubble bath: About two weeks ago.
Last time you cried: July 29th – But it was happy tears.

EIGHT HAVE YOU EVERS
Have you ever dated one of your best friends: Yes.
Have you ever been arrested: Yes.
Have you ever skinny dipped: Yes.
Have you ever been on TV: Yes.
Have you ever kissed someone, and then regretted it: Yes.
Have you ever had a sex dream about someone: Yes.
Have you ever had sex? Yes.

SEVEN THINGS YOU ARE WEARING
1. Black cotton short sleeved shirt.
2. Grey trousers
3. Black socks
4. Deep Red silk tie.
5. Black Deakins leather shoes
6. Rings.
7. Watch.

SIX THINGS YOU'VE DONE TODAY
1. Woke up.
2. Took painkillers.
3. Drunk coffee.
4. Sorted out fostering paperwork.
5. Checked email.
6. Shit myself about Ireland.

FIVE FAVOURITE THINGS IN NO ORDER
1. Brad.
2. Anything made by Apple.
3. Friends you can rely upon to give you advice you need, even when you don't want it.
4. My car.
5. Watches.

FOUR PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL ALMOST ANYTHING TO
1. Brad
2. Helen
3. Lynda
4. [censored to protect the guilty]

THREE CHOICES
1. Black or White: Black
2. Hot or Cold: Hot
3. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate

TWO THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
1. Live
2. To take a compliment

ONE THING YOU REGRET
I have no regrets.

Back is aching...

Affie has just kicked my ass at Age of Mythology...

Can't stop thinking about how much packing and stuff we've got to do...

Shit!

If you woke up and I was in bed with you, what would be your first thought?

(Kindly post your answer as a comment in my blog and post the question in yours and find out what my response would be.)

Ever made your own music video with your parents video camera?

Still got it on VHS?

Yeah?

Funny wasn't it?

Have you ever done it since? Maybe on your phone Maybe with a digital camera?

So, you've made it but what you gonna do with it?

Email it to these people! http://www.bedroom.tv/

OH MY GOD! Too funny! People make their own little music videos (such as the guy miming away to Justin Timberlake... on his bed... in his bedroom... he was easily late 20's...) then email it to theses people... who then broadcast it. Channel 376 on Sky!

It's hilarious!

And you know what... expect to see mine on there real soon!

Okay people here’s the deal.

Leave a question for me here.

About anything.

On Friday I’ll choose five and answer them. You can PM your questions if you wish.

I’ll do this every Friday.

Go on then… ask away…

http://www.icetruck.tv/index.php?id=1adb706dd4cd8188585eec974d47c47b

This is very strange.

I've set up my old PC so I can get some stuff off it, wipe it, then give it to Brad's friend Amy.

This is the the first PC I ever wrote my first ever blog entry on. Ever!

It's not my first PC but it sure feels like it.

Its ten years old, is a little slow but works likes a dream. Ten years ago this PC cost £4995 but thankfully I wasn't paying!

Hello people,

Over the weekend I heard various bits about special days coming up… Pirates Day and the such like… so I decided why can’t we have our own special days!

So here, is the Landers™ Special Holiday Calendar and it’s going to be designed by you!

But what do we do? I hear you cry…

Well leave a comment with a date (maybe you’re birthday) and how you want that day named… it could be named after you or an event you want for that day.

No this is not an online diary of blog meets and birthdays; this is annual world wide holidays we can all celebrate. If you hove over the dates you’ll see some of them (June 1st for one) have already been assigned days. So come on… pick a day, pick a celebration and let me know.

I shall update this as and when and soon(ish) there will be a linky type buttony thing in my side bar to bring you back here should you want to know what day is what.

So what do want? And when?

Hover over the highlighted/linked numbers.

January
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31
February
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29
March
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31
April
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30
May
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31
June
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30
July
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31
August
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31
September
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30
October
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25
26 27 28 29 30 31
November
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30
December
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31

I've been messing in Google Earth today and through it have learnt a new word.

Gongoozle

Gongoozlers are people who enjoy watching activity on the canals in the United Kingdom. The term is also often used in a more general way to describe those who have an interest in canals and the canal life, but do not actively participate.

You’ve won $50,000 – but have to give it all away. To which charity or institution would you donate it?
I honestly could not decide on just one so I think I'd have to split it and give it to various different ones.

If you could organize a family reunion with all of your dead relatives, where would you hold it and who would be there?
There are many dead relatives I'd love to see again but the idea of a family reunion is horrific! The thought of fat Janet being there worries me. She's not dead - yet. Evil evil old bitch!

Using only one word, describe yourself as a child.
Vile.

If you could communicate with any type of animal, which animal would you chose?
Doggie

Name the grossest thing you have ever put in your mouth.
Juzzzys dick
Fried Wasp.

If you learned that there actually was a Heaven and Hell, what is the first thing you'd change in your life?
My faith.

If you could be seven years young one whole day, knowing what you know now, how would you spend it?
I'd write myself notes telling myself who to bet on in the World Cup, to buy shares in Google, You Tube and BCUK and not to go to Derek's on that night. Oh and tell myself to lock the door!

Who is the most interesting person you have ever met?
Everyone is interesting. It's just finding that spark.

What do you think is the most soothing sound?
Night.

If you could "unknow" one thing you know, what would it be?
Who shot JR.

Has a television commercial ever moved you to go out and buy the product it was selling?
Probably but I can't think what.

If your life was a sitcom, what would the title be?
The Fucking Poof!

If you could determine who could immigrate here, would you let in those you thought would contribute the most to our country or those most in need of refuge?
Neither. Each case would be looked at on merit.

Should conjoined twins be surgically separated if it will lead to the certain death of one of the twins?
I have no fucking idea on this one!

In your opinion, what is the single most significant event that has occurred in world history during the last thousand years? (Define “significant” however you wish.)
My birth.

Does time heal all wounds?
No, but it makes them easy to tend to.

For a person you love deeply, would you be willing to move to a distant country knowing there would be little chance of seeing your friends or family again?
No. I made that offer once before and ended up single - which in hindsight was a good thing but it wasn't at the time.

Thinking back to all the great TV series finales that you’ve seen over the years, which show do you believe had the best final episode?
Too may to choose from.

What's your theme song?
I used to have two when I worked on the radio. Don't have one for now though.

Should adults try to teach young people lessons or should they leave them alone to find out about things themselves?
Both.

If you could apologise to one person you’ve hurt or offended in your life, whom would you apologise to?
Nan.

What's the most bizarre or unusual thing that's ever happened to you while travelling?
It's difficult to decide what would be considered bizarre and unusual.

Before I nip off to watch a fill-um with Affie I thought I'd share some more picture with you.

Click on the image to make it bigger...

Can't be arsed with an explanation of each picture but if you want to know about any of them (the who's, where's, why's etc) then comment and I'll tell you. EDIT: See below all the pictures.

Enjoy.

1. Shoes. Oh my God!
2. One of the cats. Could be Max, could be Huw. I don't know.
3. More shoes. Oh my God!
4. A view from one of the many lookout points. You can see our house.
5. An old train carriage acting as an animal shelter.
6. Some sheepies on the mountain.
7. See 9.
8. See 9.
9. This is a close up of the wording on the memorial stone seen in pics 7 & 8
10. Carreg Cennen.
11. Me and Affie. Ain't he lovely?!
12. Me me me.
13. Mountain Road
14. This is just water at the bottom of a small waterfall. I then just messed aboot with it in Photoshoppie Goodness the likes of Monsieur AJNSpencer(TM)
15. Before the water gets to the place in Pic.14. it goes down here first.
16. Brad.
17. Natalie ("What you takin' about Willis?")
18 to 22. Natalie & Brad.
23. The sun.
24. Some more sheepies!
25. A view from the lookout on our mountain.

As promised...

Believe it or not I actually started this at around 6am as I couldn't sleep. Since then I've had two conversations with dad, two with mother, countless with myself, had one bowl of cereals, played with two cats an read countless blogs.

I have no got dressed or had a wash or had much sleep or put the telly on to see the news.

I think I'll go back to to bed.

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
I haven't looked yet but it would be something about seeing perfection.



2. Favourite planet?
Mars. It's better than a Snickers.



3. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
Ewan McGregor, he just won't stop calling.



4. What is your favourite ring tone on your phone?
At the moment it's "In The Night" by the Pet Shop Boys but it changes.



5. Do you “label” yourself?
What, other than perfect, Adonis and gay? No I don't think I do.



6. What does your watch look like?
Which one? I collect watches.

7. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Watching Return of the Living Dead.



8. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
"Rob please answer, Ewan x"

9. What's a word or phrase that you say a lot?
"Ewan No!"

10. Last furry thing you touched?
Brad

11. Favorite age you have been so far?
33.

12. Your worst enemy?
I have none. Everyone loves me and I love everyone!

13. What is your current desktop picture?
Some red mush I stole from someone else.



14. What was the last thing you said to someone?
"I haven't got time and this donkey's not well again!"

15. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
Think of the pennies I'd get from personal appearances if I could fly... and the money I could charge for saving people from tall buildings!

I can smell onions!

16. Are you in love with someone?
Oh yes indeedy.

17. The last song you listened to?
Junior Vasquez - Get Your Hands Off My Man

18. What time of day were you born?
3.30am.



19. What's your favorite food?
Chinese - not the cooking style, the people! They taste great!

20. Where did you live in 1984?
Staffordshire

Yes, it definitely onions!



21. Are you jealous of anyone?
God yes! No, not al

22. Is anyone jealous of you?
As if! Of course, everyone!



23. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Hmm... 9th November... dunno.


24. Do you consider yourself kind?


Kindness has no place in my life.



25. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
I already have four and I want four more then I'm done. Two more on my back, one down the back of my leg and one opposite my star sign.



26. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Love

27. Would you move for the person you loved?
No. I made that offer once before and it results in me becoming single (thankfully) so I'm not going to bother anymore.



28. What's your life motto?
"Fuck off cuntbag!"

29. What's your favorite town/city?
Galway.



30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
Wednesday... could have been Thursday.

31. Can you change the oil on a car?
I could but I never will.

32. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
He was married and living in Cardiff.



33. Do you collect anything?
Watches, hats, Top Trumps Cards, Stalkers, ASBO's, fat cells, rashes, filofaxes.



34. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
Kev & Mike's wedding and I wore my kilt.



35. Have you been burned by love?
No, I do the burning.

I have been made an offer.

It's an offer that I've wanted for about fifteen years.

I've been waiting for it and hoping it would come.

So yesterday it came.

Yesterday, unannounced and unexpected, I got an email with the offer in it. I never expected it to come in an email. I always thought someone would call or turn up at my house but they didn't. Disappointing really but so be it.

I hope you're not reading this expecting to know what the offering is. I've learnt the hard way not to discuss some things too much, only to reveal the pieces I know I can defend or cope with having ridiculed. So, no, I won't be blogging about the offer, but just how it makes me feel.

There was a time I wanted nothing more than to get this offer. I did my research, I did my hours, I took my lessons and I gave others. I sat and I listened.

Through-out all that it was made obvious to me that it would be a long time before this offer was made, if at all. So in my head I accepted that as much as I was working towards it and as much as I was trying to make it happen, it still might not. I could spend the rest of my life wishing but the offer I wanted might never ever come.

It came yesterday.

I haven't told them yet about the move and even thought I know they don't read this blog one of my first thoughts was that I was only getting this offer as either a test or because I was moving so I replied and asked if it was genuine. I sent others an email, forwarding the one with offer in it, and asked them if they thought it was genuine.

Sure enough today I received confirmation, from a few different sources, that this offer is genuine. If I wanted it I could have everything I wanted.

The problem is, this was everything I wanted 15 years ago.

What I want now is different.

Fifteen years ago the idea of one day being given this offer was amazing. All I could think of was how special I'd feel. It worked. Yesterday, when I read it, I found special.

The thing is, I live with a man who makes me feel special every day. I don't need any offers to make me feel special.

Fifteen years ago I would have given my soul to have this offer made to me.

Now I have the offer of a life of complete happiness in a beautiful country with a beautiful person.

I'm thrilled to have had my offer. It still means so much to me and I'd truly love to accept it but I'm also happy to be refusing it.

September 2007 is the best September ever!

Not only do I get to start my new life with my gorgeous man in a gorgeous country but...

On the 17th...

Season Three of PRISON BREAK starts! Woooo hooo!!

So how has my morning been you ask? Well okay no you don't ask but I want to tell you.

Well since Tuesday I've had a headache that just won't seem to go away yet I've come into work every day because I'm such a fucking hero. Chuh, yeah, right. The truth is that I don't want to take time off just for a headache. I'm not going to let it beat me. Anyhoo, right now it's pounding away making sure I know it's there.

Mother rang at 9.30am to tell me father is in the hospital (as planned) but she's had to take all his clothes away or he'll walk out, he's that nervous. He's having an operation to remove his knee caps.

One of our volunteers has been in to tell me all about her visit to the Ladyboys of Bangkok. She's in her 70's, very welsh which makes her slightly difficult to understand and spent the entire Christmas meal with her hand on my knee and even on my aris at one point when we were queuing for our carvery.

Right now I'm the only person in the office and I'm desperate for a poo but can't go in case the phone rings or someone comes in. I could put a sign on the door but would rather not. "Be right back, having a shit!" didn't go down too well last time.

I'm having fun people watching though. My desk is my the window. I can see out onto our lovely high street and I see people walking up and down. The old and the young, the men and the women, the sober and the drunk. Yes, even at 10.30am our street has a pissed person. I'm hoping that we've moved before I see our foster kid stumble up the road pissed.

Right, other than take a dump, I really must do something.

You Are a Blogging Expert

You got 8/8 correct! You know so much about blogging, you should blog for a living. How Much Do You Know About Blogging?

In six minutes I shall be leaving to go home for the day!

Woot!

Finishing early!

Now wishing I wasn't in tomorrow! Bah!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/6938244.stm

Fuck you!

You know who you are!

Duncan James off of Blue.

Gay or not gay.

He's very camp but these days that means nothing!

So what do you think? Gay, or not gay?

EDIT 1: It does not matter either way, it was just part of a conversation Affie and I had! Now stop fucking PMing or emailing telling me that it shouldn't matter.

EDIT 2: Actually, it does matter, but it shouldn't!

EDIT 3: I'M FUCKING GAY AND DON'T FUCKING HIDE IT YOU TWAT! That was not aimed at you Mr. James

Had a small chat with Skip2468 this very morning and we seem to agree that Opera is by far the BEST internet browser. I never thought I'd find something better than Safari but here it is.

Go here http://www.opera.com/ and get version 9.22. It's bloody fantastic! Especially the "Speed Dial" function!

I'll take on in each colour, design and interior please!

http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/whale-ship/aeroscraft-ml866-flying-yacht-287104.php

http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/whale-ship/aeroscraft-ml866-flying-yacht-287104.php

Was sorting some pictures out on my phone and thought I'd share.

Enjoy.

Click the picture to see it bigger!

1. Laburnum Cottage in Abergavenny. Lovely little place in the middle of the town centre.
2. Under the pinkness was Charley during his stay in the Hozzy.
3. Brad, Steve and Kev on the morning of Kev's wedding.
4. Sunset in Ipswich, taken from Steve's house.
5. A teeny tiny house, 1 up, 1 down, by the coast, with no toilet/bathroom that sold for £250k.
6. This is the ancient house in Ipswich town centre. Each panel shows an artistic impression of one of the continents. But there are only four! Australia wasn't discovered at the time this place was built.
7. Phonetoshop. Oh be still my beating heart!
8. Pampering my feet.
9. Sleepy cat plant
10. Tetris with the car.
11. My cousin on her way to the dance floor for her first dance. The dress cost £3k!
12. Throwing confetti.
13. Throwing confetti again.
14. Fliss... the cat that can text.
15. Me and the Zeds.
16. Michelle trying on Zeds sunglasses.
17. Michelle trying on Zeds glasses.
18. A view from Mountain Road. You can just see our house.
19. I love this picture. I look at it and think it'll be an my first album cover... if I ever have one!

1. 2. 3.
4. 5. 6.
7. 8. 9.
10. 11. 12.
13. 14. 15.
16. 17. 18.
19.

... it was now!

Hi LandersUK,

I would like you to join my personal blog community.
My username at blog.co.uk is: play4free (http://www.blog.co.uk/user/play4free/)

Just click on the link below to accept the invitation:
(You can also copy and paste the link into your browser's address bar.)

http://www.blog.co.uk/srv/friends/friends_invitations.php

My personal message to you:
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feel free to become my friend
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&
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I cannot talk about today. Not because I miss him but because I'm so angry with whats gone on. The place he is in is a shit hole. It stinks of piss. His room hadn't even been cleaned. Anyway, as I said, I don't want to talk about it so here are some pictures in stead. The first one was take a few weeks ago, the rest were all taken tonight

Me and my sis. Love her!

The real Llanfuckwit

A view

The Sun

One of the village bus stops

These are all over our village.
Strange little things. Anyone know what they are?

This is not a memorial cenotaph, it's a family grave stone.

Another view

And yes another view

And another view for good measure

A door I like. Stupid I know but would you expect anything else from me?

The School Bell

One more view, just for luck

A window I like... not above the door a like... for shame!

Charley moves out today.

I'm starting to feel guilty about it and I don't want to.

He has been a shit over the last few months and I was looking forward to today but now I don't know how I feel about it.

Brad and I have taken the day off to help him move and, if I'm honest, so in the last few hours of being in care with us I can have a moan at the social services if the place they've given him isn't up to standard. I still can't believe they've given him a bedsit. They are using the excuse that there are no foster places available. Well I know there is. Oh well. He's not ready for a bedsit, his social worker would know that if she'd spoken to us but she hasn't so she'll find out the hard way. Very annoyed at her. Will be making my feelings known on the 15th.

Right, off to load my big shiny new car with all his stuff.

Well you all know what happens when I get bored.

Yes, it's time for a redecorate.

What do you think?

Make your own coin!

Fuck you.

Hello Landers or Paddy,

I have flagged your blog as inappropriate as I find your use of language very offensive, especially as you continue to use foul language in the title as well. I know I can unflag the blog as well and am willing to do so if you’d just stop using foul language. You didn’t use it in the blog for Amy, so why do it anywhere else? I don’t believe you talk like that in front of your children so why bring it to the vocabulary of your blog children?

You are one the popular bloggers even if your friends list isn’t as big as it should be, but I believe that is due to your constant vigilance against spam bloggers or those bloggers just out for a long friends list, so why can’t you be so vigilant about your language? Your blog could be a nice one if you just stopped swearing.

A friend.

Un-fucking-believable!

Charley: "I no longer think you're mean when you kick me off the network!"
Me: "What?"
Charley: "I no longer think you're mean when you kick me off the network. When my three hours are up and you boot me... my friends parents do it as well so I no longer think you're mean."
Me: "I really don't care!"

And you know what... I actually don't!

That's how long that fucking post was up... two fucking minutes and some cunt comes along and tags it with stop swearing.

TWO FUCKING MINUTES!!

Why does it matter when there was no cunting swearing in the title and only ONE fucking swear word in the actual blog!

Do you fucking have my entries on an RSS alarm? Does it fucking alert you when I post and when I swear?

Does it?

Serisouly what is the fucking point you cunting child! Hide behind internet wall of protection. It makes me think it's a popular blogger who just fucking hates me... lets face it, there are a few that do... but seriously, if you've got something to say then say it. Stop being such a fucking pussy.

I'm guessing you worked out that I'm not in the best of moods and thought you'd make it worse! You fucking cock juggling thunder cunt!

Sorry to everyone who may or may not use the blog entry tagging option for the right reasons but as of now I'm turning them off. Of course if the fuckheaded cunt who is tagging the posts would like to own up we can talk about it and I can give people the option again!

Cunt!

I want to fucking scream and shout but I’ve learnt that it doesn’t get me anywhere.

Mind you, neither does talking, asking politely, pointing things out, begging or wailing.

What do I have left?

Blackmail and bribery? Nasty words. Won’t be doing those.

I’m feeling rather hollow at the moment.

I hate shoes and socks.

I’m trying not to care about the fact that Charley might be leaving us by Monday. He has been a pain in the rear end for the last few months and basically caused me a load of stress I could do without. At the moment it’s very much ”Do what you like just leave me alone!” situation just for a quiet life, and that pisses me off as I think I’d rather he knew he can’t behave like that, but then I think ’well he won’t be with us soon’ and everything seems fine. Of course, now though when I say think that he won’t be with us soon it’s actually true and I’m getting feelings that I don’t want.

I don’t want to care but I think I do.

Love Survey
You must answer every question TRUTHFULLY!!

[01] Do you still think about your ex?
Yes – but it’s only think as in ”I’m better off without you!”

[02] Have you ever been heartbroken?
Yes

03] What Movie reminds you of your current boyfriend, girlfriend or ex?
Romeo & Juliet reminds me of Stuart
The Blues Brothers or Risky Business reminds me of Derek.
Run Lola Run reminds me of Brad.

[04] How many times have you honestly thought you loved someone?
Three

[05] Do you believe that everyone has a soul mate?
Yes

[06] What is your current relationship problem?
None.

[07] Have you ever loved 2 people at the same time?
Loved – no. Had a relationship with – Yes.

[08] Your thoughts of your best friend and your ex?
Have more than one best mate, my ex is a cunt.

[09] Have you ever seen a friend as more than a friend?
Yes.

[10] Do you believe in second chances?
Yes

[11] Have u ever been kissed underneath the fire works?
Yes

[12] What is your favourite colour(s)?
Green or Red

[14] Do you believe you only love once?
No, but love everyone differently

[15]Could u marry someone right now?
Yes.

[16] At what age did you start noticing the opposite sex?
Never have.

[17] What song reminds you of your ex or current boyfriend/girlfriend.
Anything by Savage Garden reminds me of Stuart, although I wish it didn’t
The Grease Megamix reminds me of Derek (Oh the shame!)
Anything by No Doubt or Gwen Stephanie reminds me of Brad

[18] Do you know someone who likes you?
Yes.

[19] Do you like anyone?
Yes.

[20] Do you care about someone who is not with you or know about your feelings?
Ermm… no I don’t think so. Those who know I care about them know about it. I think.

...I really want to smoke!

Just handed my notice in...