Best viewed at www.iamlanders.com

I can see my blog... but can't see the entries... and can't reply to any of you comments...

Lousia, Mama, Ladee... see all your comments in the email but can't see them on my blog... I have my header, my side bars... but no actual blog!

What the fuck has happened to my blog?

Ladies and gentlemen of Blogville...

I introduce to you Rosencrantz and Dave!

Loved all the suggestions for names... still haven't decided... think I'll end up doing a poll...

Until then... here ya go..

http://www.chatzy.com/446293736105

- It's a private chat room... bloggers only...

... if you can read my blog but I can't get onto it... I can get on everyone else, just not mine!!!!

Bastard!

As some of you may or may not know I'm a HUGE Prison Break fan. I don't mean I'm huge, I just mean I like it ... a lot!

Anyhoo...

It was far more than five minutes!!!!

We're down for a short maintenance, we'll be back in 5 minutes!

Wir führen gerade kurze Wartungsarbeiten durch und sind in 5 Minuten wieder da!

Nous faisons des travaux d'entretien droit, et sommes de retour dans 5 minutes!

Nathan1 had Little Nate...

What name shall I give my two fellas...

Myself, the cast, crew and committee of DeAF (Deaf Aware Filmmakers) would be grateful if you could not only attend but also pass this on!

LAUNCH EVENT

Venue: The Depot Studio, Swansea Grand Theatre
Date: Tuesday 8th May 2007
Time: 4:30pm – 7:30pm

Official opening by the right Worshipful the Lord Mayor of the City and County of Swansea, Councillor Chris Holley at 5:00pm.

Deaf Aware Film-makers (DeAF) would like to invite you to a special launch event to celebrate the production of a DVD to promote deaf awareness and highlight some of the issues faced by those with hearing loss.

The film features interviews with local people from a variety of backgrounds sharing their experiences of hearing loss.

Members of the cast and crew will be present to show you the director’s cut and talk to you about the making of the film.

We are showing this film during Deaf Awareness Week. The Depot Studio is located on the 3rd floor of the Swansea Grand Theatre, a lift is available.

The social workers arrived on time, which actually doesn’t surprise me with this pair, as they are both quite efficient.

It would appear I was wrong about Anne. She is still a lovely person. So the meeting when on and all was well. We … well I… made my feelings known about the department and yes we’re still jumping through hoops for them but this time we’re saying when and where.

It is very possible that this was all done and said to make sure they keep us and as soon as we’ve been reregistered they’ll all become wankers again but something about the meeting just made me feel like they were actually listening and were going to do something about it.

It’s not over yet, we have a panel meeting to go to but this was a big step. Our social worker supports out re-registration and now so does a senior practitioner. It’s all gravy!

After finishing work yesterday we went off to Swansea for our meeting about the DeAF DVD. As usual we were early so nipped into KFC for a bite to eat and then a quick zip round the shops.

Off to the meeting which went well. I think I upset some people by actually speaking my mind but certain things had to be said.

Our launch event is on May 8th. I’ll be blogging a bit more about that later or over next few days but you’re all invited. It’s at the Grand Theatre in Swansea and you’re all welcome.

After the meeting we nipped back to the shops. I bought some lovely boots and a new handbag. Brad has a new handbag as well. And he made me steal another one!

It’s been five days since I stopped smoking and today was the first day I didn’t actually want one. Every day I’ve been desperate for one but so far today I haven’t. Even when Juzzzy did his utmost to wind me up I still didn’t actually want one. I’m sure I will later but at the moment I really don’t want one.

Sow what else can I tell you? Dunno.

Am sat slurpping my morning coffee...

Sutied and booted for work... quite literally actually beacause I bought some new booties yesterday but I'll tell you all about those later...

The meeting yesterday went well.... more on that later...

The meeting last night went well.... more on that later...

For the first time in just under a week while drinking coffee I do not want a cigarette... That must be a sign!

I've have lost a friend from my list and can't work out who but has also gained a friend... interesting... well to me anywya!

Twas my fathers birthday yesterday... I wonder what I got him?

Roight... orf to wer-k!

In the last 12 months fostering for us has been a nightmare.

I don't if it's because we've been doing it for a while and the department thing they can just do what they like because they have us over a barrel or if it was always this hard, I just didn't notice it before.

It used to be a pleasure. It used to be fun. We'd have different kids here all the time and every weekend would be so different because of the mixture of kids. Even with the problem children, it was still fun.

The social services have ruined it for me. I blame them completely. I don't blame R, our long term foster kid, although at times I'd like to. I'm hard on him but it gets the job done and he gets the message and sadly this is the only way he'll learn for the future. He's nearly 17, he's too old to be taught the lessons children are taught, the ones he's missed out on because of his fucked-up family.

So no, I don't blame him. As I said, I blame the social services. They have ruined my last 12 months fostering to the point where today I'd be quite willing to jack it all in.

We have two social workers coming at 9.30am. Our social worker, Pat, who is lovely. She's very helpful and always tries to do the best for us. Then coming with her is Anne. Anne was lovely. She supported me at panel while Brad was in Birmingham with our old social worker, and Anne was at all our training. Since the shake up in the department it would Anne was not as lovely as I first thought but I don't know if it's just because she's following orders. I'll find out today.

Anyway, Pat and Anne are coming here to do our annual review. This is where we get assessed as carers to see if we're suitable to do it again for another months. This have happened in January as that was when last years was done. Last years should have been done the October before that! It goes on and on!

They can, if they so wish, decide today that we are no longer suitable to be foster carers and part of me hopes they do, for the following reasons...

No.1. Brad and I would get our house back.
No.2. I get to be angry today for more that just not having a fag.
No.3. I get to tell them they are wrong.
No.4. It saves me telling them to fuck off

But...

If they do, which they won't, but if they do I'll be devastated.

I tell ya, it's such a vicious circle they have us trapped.

"Do you want to help needy children?"
"Yes."
"Great. All we ask is that you put up with this shit from the department!"
"But I don't want to."
"Then you can't look after children!"
"So I'm a bad parent!"
"No, but you're not suitable!"
"Why?"
"Because you won't call Jake Morgan God, you argue with Jim Downey ... oh and you keep wittering on about money with owe you from March!"
"Okay, I'll shut up about now can I look after children?"
"No, there is one more hoop you have to jump through?"
"Oh, what's that God?"
"We want you!"
"What?"
"Sign here and you'll see!"
"What is it?"
"It's a contract."
"Can I read it?"
"If you want but that will void it."
"So I can't read it?"
"I didn't say that."
"Yes you did."
"No I didn't. I said if you read it, it becomes void."
"Okay I'll sign it. Can I read it then?"
"If you want but it'll be too late."
"Too late?"
"Yes, we will rule your life by then!"
"Right. Okay, it's signed but I think I rule my own life."
"Really?"
"Yes, it's my life, I say what goes!"
"Really?"
"Yes"
"Bend over!"

You get the picture! I could write so much more that would really tell you how great the department aren't but I think you understand that now.

Was chatting with Subbers the other night and I happened to mention that I miss Nate! (Nathan1) and Little Nate so while lying in bed tonight, bored shiteless I did this.

I do not profess to be the next Nate or be able to produce the wit of Little Nate but as I said I was bored.

I'm sure you'll get the message.

EDIT: If you can't read the text click the image.... twice.

There people... http://www.welshcommunists.org/ ...just had a partly political broadcast on BBC Wales.

Are they taking the fucking piss?

Communism is the way forward?

Yes because my grandpa fought in the war so I'd have queue for fucking bread and pay £10 for it!

Fucking wankers!

P.S. I'll be replying to everyones comments from my earlier post shortly.

FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
CUNT
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK

http://doicare.blog.co.uk/2007/04/24/may_i_introduce_paddy~2151779

Ain't GTalk grand!

juzzzy
Marlboro "Gold". Mm-mmmm.

Paddy
I'm so on the verge of storming away from my desk in a queen-hissy -fit and just lighting up

juzzzy
For a big puff? Oh.

Paddy
Coming?

juzzzy
No, it's just the way I'm sitting.

Paddy
Shame

juzzzy
Fuck off!

Paddy
You sit like you're coming... that's interesting

juzzzy
Argh

Paddy
Must remember that

(I really don't give a shit I've blogged this before!)

For Andy..

How I feel right now...

I have not had a cigarette for 12 hours.

I am going to kill someone very soon.

Y’ know I was never a big fan of Destiny’s Child, I liked the odd on and sang along to others, or moved my fine booty around the dance floor like it ain’t no thang, but was never really a fan but I must say I’m liking nearly everything Bouncy has done! Am LOVIN’ the new one with Shakira so for your pleasure and to cheer me up the video is at the end of this blog rant.

Now… my rant!

Sky News
The fact that ”Michael Schumacher” is coming into the studio to talk about road safety is NOT breaking news! Breaking news is something that brings on high emotion as people tune it to see what’s going. Personally I can’t stand Michael Schumacher (heaven forbid some dumb cunt should call me a racist) but have to admit he’s the worlds superior Formula 1 driver… on talent alone… add his personality and he bobs along at the bottom… but he is not worthy of the Sky News BREAKING NEWS banner! Also, on this subject, saying “he is coming in to talk to us” means he is coming into to join you in the studio. It does NOT mean he will be in the BBC TV Centre while you jabber away nice in Isleworth.

The Chris Moyles Show
Regular viewers will know that this particular subject quite often appears in my rants. Usually they are about Chris himself, twat, or Aled the annoying fucker but today, here at GBNW, we’re taking a look at one of the other arseholes within the Chris Moyles show!

Dave Vitti. You are not famous. You are known. That is as far as it goes. You do NOT host the The Chris Moyles show. You only co-host the shite you do with Chappers (I quite like Chappers!). The only people discussing the face your not sterile are those who have seen your girlfriend with her bump, those you’ve told personally (family, friends and such like) and possibly your doctor. You are not in the national papers, you are not splashed on a billboard, in fact I guess that the majority of your faked listeners wouldn’t know you as Dave Vitti but Comedy Dave – a name which you really don’t deserve.

Drivers
White zigzag lines either side of a zebra crossing do not mean “feel free to park and stop all the traffic”. It actually means you cannot park here. SO STOP FUCKING DOING IT!!! A good reason to stop doing it is because I’ve started taking pictures and if it helps my rage I will be sending these along with times and dates to the police. I don’t care that you park on the white lines but it fucks me off that stop the traffic on a busy main road. And YES Crumbs, I know it’s all people coming to you… and YES Susan… I know you’re one of them! You food is shit and full of hairs and now you’ve shown that neither you or your staff know anything about the Highway Code – or even the common fucking decency of NOT holding up the traffic on a main fucking road you bitch!

R
When you ask me a question stand and wait for the answer. The main fucking reason you got a no this morning was because you asked the question and then walked off. This tells me that not only do you have no fucking manners (which I actually know you do but haven’t seen them recently) but also that you had already decided in your head the answer would be yes so it wasn’t going to matter what I said, which is also why I said no louder than you expected. The shock on your face said it all. YOU DO NOT RUN MY LIFE! – Although for too long now you have had too big an influence on it. Things will change!

British American Tobacco UK Ltd, Gallaher Ltd and Imperial Tobacco Ltd and all the other fags makers
I don’t blame you for me smoking. You weren’t there handing them to me. You weren’t holding the lighter. You weren’t there forcing me to inhale. But, you are the ones who make a lethal product that I’m now sat here wanting. All I want is to draw in on one of those long slender tubes of smokey goodness! I can buy new lungs!
I’ve only been up a couple of hours and I’m desperate to smoke but I’m also desperate to give up. I can do this. I can. BUT… if I put one ounce on through not smoking then fuck it, I shall smoke!

And so on to bigger and better and things… Here is Bouncy & Shakira… it’s the dance version as it’s better than the ballady poo!

So we got home and in the post were my course results!

Well some of them...

This course is all individual lessons. There are 24 of them. Each one has to be marked, it's not like I do four lessons and then get a mark. So in essence I've had 24 exams!

BUT... there are only eight questions per lessons. Sometimes they only require one sentence for the answer, other times (most of them in fact) they require longer answers and sometimes I end up have to use extra paper.

Tentatively I opened the envelopes...

Lesson 7 - 95%
Lesson 8 - 85%
Lesson 9 - 95%
Lesson 10 - 83%
Lesson 11 - 83%

The fact that it's gone down worries me... now I'm nervous about the other 13 arriving!!!

My tags... my thoughts...

2007 bloscars award winner - No I'm not.
"msn whore" - Just because I'm on when you're on doesn't mean I'm always there... okay so I am!
? - How did you do this? (it's the little heart in case you didn't know!)
a fucking legend - Legend = a nonhistorical or unverifiable story handed down by tradition from earlier times and popularly accepted as historical. - So I'm old and a possible not real then?
a hero - You saw me dressed as Wonderwoman didn't you?
a lovely person -
a taff called paddy - ahem!
a-star - I have a A-star in one GCSE! Got U's in all the others mind!
ace - LOVE this word! I do not use it enough!
and hell yeah i'm the mother fucking princess - You can be princess... I am the Queen!
bagpipe boy - Hahahahahahahaaaaaa god damn Ebay!
barking - Woof!
benny hill - Arse!
big fag - Well yes.
blind beggar - No... deaf, not blind
bring on hte revolution!!!!!!!!!!! - I am. Don't think it's been forgotten... it is being worked on in the background.
caaaaarrdiff innit. - I love Cardiff. So much better than Swansea!
calender -What?
celeb - Who?
charming - You must have me mixed up with someone else.
cj woz ere - You were?
cock juggling thunder cunt - My most used phrase.
come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off - Thank you Zeds
deaf - I am
deaf cunt - Err... yes
fag - No? Really? I hope Brad knows!
fellow blogathoner Will be doing it again!
film buff - Yeppers
flirt - With who? Come on, name ONE person I flirt with?
foster carer - Yeppers
fred See Benny Hill!
fucking laptop I do not!
fucking top bloke - Actually I'm more of a bottom.
full of shit - Sometimes but it's usually gone by 9am.
gb101 - I see I'm not alone!
getting married - Whoooo hooooo!!!!
guess-who - Is she wearing a hat?
has got my tankard - Hahahahaaaa... I still say it!
has opinions and shouldnt be afraid to share them - But I should shut up sometimes!
has the clap - The cream sorted it!
he made my day - I just bought the ingredients, you mixed it together!
he-s back and he-s bad- - I feel like Michael Jackson
hello i'm mrs gideon!- Hello Mrs Gideon. Pleased to meet you.
helpful - I am?
his real name is robert cushing - No it isn't.
hypnotised me - I did.
i'm frickin' lost - You and me both.
imdb - You know I don't own that site don't you?
is secretly jason orange I thought I was Robert Cushing?
is welsh - No I'm not.
jason orange jason orange jason orange - Tourettes again?
jesus loves you - No he doesn't.
kathleen turner is his wife charlie - So there!
kathleen turner is not your wife - I beg to differ.
latin speaking lapdancer - Erm....
love the tags - And me!
loves kids(as a parent not a sicko) - Yes but I couldn't eat a whole one.
loves me - I do.
mac loving lappy shagger - I used to but I have sticky keys now
makes me smile - Good
makes short films - I do.
me likey - You likey what?
mega dad -
my bestest friend -
oh yes he does - He does what?
oi oi sexy - Yes?
olde-worlde charm - Does this mean I smell and have bad teeth?
owes me a coffee - You know where I am if you want it.
paddy fruits made to make your mouth water - ?
peppermint paddy - Arse!
peter cushing was his grandad - no really! - He was not.
plowmans fan - I suppose
put up with me - It's a pleasure not a chore
ranty - Don't start me!
rudebox soul mekanik dub - Ri-ight.
sensitive - in a good way - Like a gentle shampoo?
sex god - Like venus?
sexy - What am I?
sexy flirt - Again, who do I flirt with? I mean come on! I'm pure and innocent!
sexy grrrr - I think you missed the I and the L out of that
shabaz is alive and on blogland - Hahahahahahaaaaa! Love this one!
shake your rudebox - I did. It got stuck
shaves his legs - Only for special occaisions
shit hot in bed - Juzzzy shhh!
show us yer taters! - No.
sick with nerves help - Bach will help
siennafan - No denying that
slap-n-tickle - Yes please
smokes fags - Hopefully not for long
snagglepuss -
squid molester - It was all very innocent and consentual
stalker-friendly - Bring it on
such a bad boy - I amn't
sweet little cuddlebun -
tag analyst - Well yes, I think this proves that!
talks too much - Yes
tixylix - Your my wife now!
twat - Thank you
upfront - Sometimes
very strong - It's all the weightlifting
we like paddy - So do we!
wee cute kitten xxx -
weired - I am.
welcome back xx - Thank you
wheres my bloscar- - Erm... in the post?
which wats the bathroom? - Are you in the east wing or the west wing?
xanadu - I love this film!!!
yeppers - Yeppers
_takes it up the ass! - Doesn't everyone?

I have no idea what they hell was wrong with me last night but some of you will be pleased to hear I'm all better now. Sorry for my vile language and attitude. I promise it will never happen again!

So, as promised... my dream...

This dream was had at some time between Friday night and Saturday morning. If anyone LJ wishes to analyse it please feel free...

I'm at my old school. I'm not a pupil but I'm not teacher either but I am there to direct and stage a play in the main hall. The play we're staging is The Return of the Real Inspector Hound, which is one of my favourites. The ''children'' performing are all my age but I don't know any of them but they were all in uniform.

The doors open and the audience comes in. There are no chairs laid out but instead they are stacked in one corner with a sign pointing to them saying something like "Take a chair and a find a space". Everyone crams in and there are that many people that there is no aisle and everyone is squashed in. My mother is sat right in the middle, desperately trying to smoke.

The curtains goes up and everything that can go wrong does and it's all obviously the performers fault. As they come off stage I say to them "why are you doing this?" and they reply "because we hate you!"

The play comes to end and there in the opposite wing to me is Helen Mirren. She comes on to stage and gives a speech about tonight. I don't understand why she's there. I look out to my mom who still has the same ciggie and she is pointing to Helen Mirren and clapping, then points to the front row of the audience and when I look it's full of celebs. But... it's not full of different celebs.... there are four Cameron Diaz's and three Tom Cruises, but it's not that there are just three of them, but it's three different Tom's. It's Tom from is Risky Business days and then Tom from his Top Gun days, and then Tom as he is now. The same goes Miss Diaz... four different era's of Diaz. And this is the same for all the celebs there. There are only actually five or six celebs but they FILL the front row as there is three or four of them each.

Anyhoo, these celebs are going WILD for Helen Mirren. They are pressed up against the stage and clapping very very animatedly. I can't hear what Helen Mirren is saying but before long her speech finishes and everyone leaves.

Apart from my mother. Who is still sat exactly where she has been and is still trying to smoke. I go up to her and say "so what did you think?" to which she replies "It was shit!" and I end up agreeing with her. She asks me where I got Helen Mirren from and I tell her I don't know but then the kids, who "appear" back on stage tell me they got her for me! I say "but I thought you hated me?" and they just roll their eyes and leave.

So, the play has been a total flop, mother has walked off muttering something about going for a drink so I decide it's a good idea and I go and find a bar.

I walk in and there sat at one of the tables is my friend Kev and his partner Mike. I've never met Mike but have seen a few pics and heard a lot about him. Kev wants to know what I'm doing in Ipswich and why I didn't tell him I was there. I didn't even know I was in Ipswich! He has a go at me and storms off but I follow. He introduces me to Mike but it's not Mike it's my ex-partner, Stuart. Kev says he didn't know how to tell me he was seeing Stuart but now I know so it's okay but I make excuses and walk out saying I need some cigarettes.

I go into the shop next door, buy fags, but then can't find my way out. I have to ring Kev to get directions. These directions consist of "come out the shop, turn left, and then come in the first door on your left"

I follow his directions and walk back into the same bar and there is everyone from the play, the audience (including my mother who is still trying to smoke and all the celebs) and everyone from the bar, all stood behind Kev and Stuart and everyone is clapping and cheering me.

Then I wake up.

Analyse that!

EDIT: To see the results click here

There has been a strange smell following me around all day and I haven't been able to work out what it was. I had a shower this morning. I washed fully, all cracks and creases and I dried properly.

Still I haven't been able to work out what it was.

Until now...

My trainers fucking stink! See AJ, I do own shoes... well trainers!

That'll learn me for not wearing socks!

I fucking hate shoes and socks! Lets ban them.

I graciously fling my sábot into the fire!

But inside I'm shouting the word "cunt" an awful lot.

Coffee anyone? No takers? Cup of cold sick?

Bastard!

Someone remind tomorrow to blog the dream I had last night. Can't be fucked doing it now!

Why am I feeling slightly full of rage when then really is fuck all wrong?

Time of the month? Time of the week? It's that hour of the day?

Bollocks!

(The word CUNT appears three times in my tags. CUNTS appears twice. All that is about to change. Just thought you'd like to know!)

Blah blah blah de blah blah.

Piffle piffle piffle.

Waffle waffle waffle blah de waffle piffle.

Don't ask, I have no idea.

One of those moods...

"I mean what is it?"
"It's a potato m'lord!"
"No, it's a rhetorical question!"
"No, it's definately a potato!"

......................................

"I have a good idea!"
"You should be careful having those!"
"Oh, why is that?"
"My brother had a good idea and his foot fell off!"
"What was his good idea?"
"To cut his toe nails with a scythe!"

Part of my job is to promote our organisation.

On July 14th our town has it's annual fun day which includes a parade. Me and my volunteers are going to be in this parade.

I desperately need ideas.

Theme is based around the French as the 14th is Bastilles Day (why that affects us is beyond me) so any ideas must have a "French Connection!" Don't even think of suggesting dressing up as characters from "The French Connection" or "The French Leuitenants Woman" as no one around will have a clue what it's about it's not descriptive enough.

Please help... give me ideas... Please please please help!

Guess where I’m driving to this afternoon?

Yes… Birmingham… again!

It’s every other week until the first weekend of June!

Anyhoo… on to better things…

Coming out on my birthday… a mini blog meet…

June 1st (Friday) meet in town the off to Snobs.

June 2nd (Saturday) daytime- meet in town do something Evening – Come and see Brad & I dancing in a whole big dance show! If you do want to come to that I need £5 off you for the ticket! Let me know.

Sky news you god damn twats!

Saying "I am Jesus!" is NOT worshipping Satan!

Get your fucking facts straight before you compare!

So as foster-carers we have to have an annual review. All the social workers write a little bit about us, our main social worker writes a report on us, we comment about our social worker and the department and then we have a meeting at our house with our social worker and a senior practitioner. Then we go to panel. This just means we sit in front of a load of people and they ask us questions and we answer them and then they decide if we’re still suitable to be foster carers.

I have no worries about this. I know we are suitable.

The meeting (at our house, not the panel) is going on next Thursday… 26th April… 9.30am

Remember my last blog entry… about the issues with C & R… and how a meeting has to go ahead to discuss the next step… a meeting at which either Brad or I or both must be present to support R. A meeting at which our social worker must be present to support us. A meeting at which R must be present to give his side of things…

Guess when this meeting is… Thursday 26th April at 10am.

So we tell them this is not suitable for us and it must be changed. It can’t be changed as this is the only time everyone can be present so we’ll just have to write a statement.

I can’t be there.
Brad can’t be there
R can’t be there
Our social worker can’t be there

Who exactly is going to stand up for R? Who is going to put his side of things across? No one!

So this morning I thought ”fuck this” and have rang the department and insisted the change it.

The woman I speak to in the department has had a little issue with me because I have issues with her husband but a few months ago at a training event I told the masses how great she is so now she is my best friend and as soon as I tell the story she went off on one explaining how it’s very wrong and that they will have to change the meeting.

A tiny success in a situation that could potentially end with a 16-year-old innocent lad going to prison. It won’t… I’ll see to that, as too many people know he is innocent but potentially that is just one of the outcomes.

So last night I promised you an update about our foster-lad and the allegations against him. I never did it. Sorry. Here it is.

R, our foster lad, a week or so ago he came home and started complaining that C, another of our foster lads, hadn't met up with him in the town centre as he'd promised to. He revealed that C was supposed to meet R to give him back a Zippo lighter. This lighter had gone missing two weeks ago and at the week R asked C about it and C admitted to him that he'd taken it and they agreed to meet in town the next day so C could give it back to R. R has been told a few times that he cannot deal with these situations himself and must inform us. Not so anyone can be told off but so we're aware of it. If theft is going on in the house we need to know and it has to be reported. R continues to break this rule and sorts problems out himself as he demands it's part of his independence. Independence is all well and good but not when it comes to other foster kids. He has been told that they are our foster kids and not his so we have to deal with it. It never gets through.

Anyway, so this lighter has gone and C never turned up to give it him back and now he wants us to do something about it.

Part of me wanted to say "well tough shit, if you'd come to us in the first place we might have been able to deal with it, maybe this will teach you lesson!" and I did actually say that but also said we'd try and sort it out.

So we rang C's mother. Who was very helpful. I'm not being my usual sarcastic cunt there, she was actually very helpful. She spoke to C who denied everything so we chatted with R. It was decided that we should go round, put the pair of them in the room together, and try and sort it. So off we went.

Once there C still denied it and it was damn obvious he was lying but at the end of the day it was C's word against R's and vice versa so what could we do?

Well we asked the question "Why did you admit to taking it and agree to meet him?"

His head went down. There was a pause and then he answered... "because he threatened to beat me up?"

Stunned silence from everyone. This is the first we'd heard of it and R was obviously a little angry but kept his mouth shut like he'd been told to. (We told him to keep quiet and we'd give him his chance to speak!).

After more questioning C claimed that R beats him up at night in the bedroom. R claimed this was a lie. Thankfully C & R are never alone in the room. P (yet another foster kid) is in the room as well!

"So," we said, "if we speak to P what will he say?"
"He'll say yes," replied C.
"Yes what?"
"Yes R beats me up!"

Well Brad and I know R's history and it is quite possible that it was true. THis would mean a huge heap of shit as R is 16 and it means he could be tried as an adult for child abuse. R denied it all but to be honest it didn't put me at ease.

We decided that the meeting had now got too serious to carry on and we'd have to end it, so we did and headed home. R was understandably angry but we told him we'd contact P and see what he had to say.

Once home we rang P and he told us that he has never seen R beat up C. Fantastic. P cannot lie. He tries but fails. If you say to him "is that a lie?" and it is he says "yes!" straight away. As I said, he cannot lie. So after hearing him say he hadn't seen R beat up C I felt very confident that it doesn't happen and felt that I can back up R 100%.

So we contacted social workers as it now becomes a child protection matter and yesterday the first, of what will turn into many meetings, took place. The social workers present listened to us and by the end of it, taking everyones previous history into account, it has been decided that C is lying. It had to be passed onto the assessment team who decided whether it needs to be taken further.

Well today one of the social workers rang back to say the assessment team have decided that a meeting should take place with everyone (including C & R) present and see if it can be sorted that way. If at the end of that nothing has been solved then we have only one root. C must go to the police and report R for child abuse. R must go to the police and tell them C has stolen a £30 Zippo lighter. As I said, thankfully I can fully 100% support R but which "crime" do you think the police are going to take more seriously?

I feel really sorry R, even more so after another incident that happened with his famliy yesterday (who are all bastards and bitches) but thankfully I can support him and will be doing so.

Was I wrong to cull my friends list without asking first?

I've just had a interesting message from an ex-blog friend.

Hi Paddy,

Why did you cut me? I always read your blog and have commented!

It's your blog but it would have been nice to be asked!

Well first off, yes, it's my blog so I'll have who I want on my friends list and secondly they only commented ONCE... ever!

Oh and 3, I have NEVER commented on their blog! I couldn't even tell you the last time I read it!

And D. they haven't blogged in about six months!

So tell me, was I wrong?

H A P P Y
B I R T H D A Y
P A U L

Just had a bit of a culling of friends.

It felt good.

I've just been watching the news...

I wasn't going to blog about this because enough people and no one needs me adding to anything that has already been said in words better than I can but...

What the fuck is going on when they have a gun shop on the campus! It's a university or college or whatever. It's a place of education for fucks sake! What the bastard do you need a gun shop for? There must be enough in the town!

I feel really sorry for all those affected by this incident but can't help but feel a little bit annoyed that someone somewhere thought it would be a good idea to put a gun shop on campus!

Twenty school shootings in ten years... will they ever learn?

We'll never stop people being able to get hold of guns but we could make it harder.

I'm still shocked that some fucking wanker puts a gun shop on a college campus! You fucking knob. Why didn't you get shot?

Meno wanted me to do a video with me narrating... well I coudn't think what to say... so until then... this will have to do...

*If the video isn't playing come back and try again... it will do.. just give You Tube a moment.

- Got approval to buy four members of staff and five volunteers, all of whom completed an eight week first aid course, a small token to say well done and thank you.
- Had a meeting about the allegation - will blog more about that after the baff
- Had our Sign Language assessment, seven weeks late, think we've passed, I'm confident anyway.
- Had to deal with a pain in the arse foster child who I now actually feel sorry for and wondering why I don't feel angry considering everything.
- Avoided someone on the phone when she asked for me... even though she was speaking to me! I'm a bad person!

Am now going for a baff. Need to destress and relax. I love fostering but my God it does come with huge problems sometimes.

Back later.

I'm sat at my desk.

I've been sat here for a few hours now.

I have done no work.

My mind is a complete and utter blank.

I honestly don't know what to do yet I know I actually have a lot to do.

Oh well... I'm still getting paid.

- Woke up in a ranty mood.
- Sorted out my flat tyre.
- Spent 30 minutes at work doing what appeared to be nothing.
- Spent four hours training three volunteers, as no one else turned up, in Child Protection issues - Great fucking subject!
- Spent 45 minutes at work doing not a lot.
- Posted off the last few lessons of my course.
- Picked the kids up from school
- Hung out a load of washing.
- Dropped the kids off home.
- Ironed four loads of clean stuff

Now I have to write diary notes up as a social worker is coming tomorrow to discuss the allegation issues.

One of the social workers coming is one I'm going to complain about. This should be fun.

Fuck fuckety fuck fuck fuck.

Woman and daughter open up a chocolate shop during lent opposite a church in a town somewhere in France!!!

“Oooooh the deceit! How could they?”

“Quick Mildred Mildréd get m’ gun! Bernice, light the flaming torches! Lets burn them out of their little shop and melt the choccy!”

“At lent as well! Disgustin’!”

“Ooooh hang on… it’s opposite a church!”

“And the daughter is only six!”

“Okay we’ll forgive them and God bless the little children everywhere!”

”No, fuck ‘em all, kill them kill them! Kick ‘em ‘til they’re dead otherwise they’ll make a really bad film with a shit story line and actors with the talent of Vegas in Space stars!”

Oh the humanity!

Okay so I’m over-reacting and all that but at the end of the long fucking drawn out day I do not like the film Chocolat and if Brad wants to watch then he can… just not with me around… and while we’re talking about not watching films… how can Mr. I’m-not-allowed-to-watch-Chocolat have an opinion Bloodline or Vegas in Space? Eh?

For those of you have no idea what I’m ranting on about now click here!

Morning fuckers.

Is it really newsworthy that the Royal young 'un split from his girlfriend? Okay so maybe it is, he is the future king after all, but do we need to know why? There could be a million one reasons why and none of them are anything to do with us! if the news stopped fucking about with it and stopped telling us, maybe just once "oh and the cute Royal has dumped his biatch!" would be enough, the so be it, just once is enough! EVERY DAY IS NOT! Cunts all of them.

So the sailors got stopped from selling their stories to the papers! Good! If other military personnel are banned from selling their stories then those 15 should be stopped as well! Wankers! Boo hoo the 15 of you! "Where's our million quid!" you fucked up while doing your job. You FUCKED up! You got it wrong... would that be in your story!

So, the government are going to toughen up Mental Health laws... about fucking time! I'm not saying everyone who has a mental illness needs locking up but some do and it's those lack of laws that stops them!

Apparently we've stopped using the phrase "war on terror". Did we ever do anything about it anyway?

Blah blah blah!

Can you tell I'm in one of those moods? Now look again at the title, I did warn you not to read. I don't think I should go to work today.

Stolen off Jake but also read on AJ and Gilraen's blog.

1. Name a movie you have seen more than 10 times
Rebecca

2. Name a movie you’ve seen multiple times in the theater
Blade Runner

3. Name an actor who would make you more inclined to see a movie
I cannot name just one.

4. Name an actor who would make you less likely to see a movie
I cannot name just one.

5. Name a movie you can and do quote from
I cannot name just one.

6. Name a movie musical in which you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs
I cannot name just one.

7. Name a movie you have been known to sing along with.
I cannot name just one.

8. Name a movie you would recommend everyone see
Rebecca

9. Name a movie you own
There are over 300 of the buggers.

10. Name an actor who launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops.
Chris Evans (not the ginger one!)

11. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in?
Yeppers Wasn't the same.

12. Ever made out in a movie?
Yeppers

13. Name a movie you keep meaning to see but you just haven’t gotten around to yet.
Romeo & Juliet - I don't think I'll ever watch it, but I have my reasons.

14. Ever walked out of a movie?
Yeppers - Natural Born Killers - Absolute shite! - Something else as well but I forget what.

15. Name a movie that made you cry in the theatre.
Too many to mention.

16. Popcorn?
Yeppers.

17. How often do you go to the movies
About one a month. There isn't really anything recently that I want to see.

18. What’s the last movie you saw in the theatre?
Sunshine - Shite.

19. What’s your favourite/preferred genre of movie?
I like them all but prefer true life things.

20. What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the theatre?
Snow White.

21.. What movie do you wish you had never seen
I'm glad I've seen everything I've watched, I can have an opinion on them then.

22. What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed?
Vegas in Space

23. What is the scariest movie you’ve seen?
The Elephant Man. Scares the fucking crap out of me. In fact I've only ever been able to watch it in three sittings.

24. What is the funniest film you have ever seen?
There are loads. I couldn't name just one.

Stolen off Jake but also read on AJ and Gilraen's blog.

1. Name a movie you have seen more than 10 times
Rebecca

2. Name a movie you’ve seen multiple times in the theater
Blade Runner

3. Name an actor who would make you more inclined to see a movie
I cannot name just one.

4. Name an actor who would make you less likely to see a movie
I cannot name just one.

5. Name a movie you can and do quote from
I cannot name just one.

6. Name a movie musical in which you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs
I cannot name just one.

7. Name a movie you have been known to sing along with.
I cannot name just one.

8. Name a movie you would recommend everyone see
Rebecca

9. Name a movie you own
There are over 300 of the buggers.

10. Name an actor who launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops.
Chris Evans (not the ginger one!)

11. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in?
Yeppers Wasn't the same.

12. Ever made out in a movie?
Yeppers

13. Name a movie you keep meaning to see but you just haven’t gotten around to yet.
Romeo & Juliet - I don't think I'll ever watch it, but I have my reasons.

14. Ever walked out of a movie?
Yeppers - Natural Born Killers - Absolute shite! - Something else as well but I forget what.

15. Name a movie that made you cry in the theatre.
Too many to mention.

16. Popcorn?
Yeppers.

17. How often do you go to the movies
About one a month. There isn't really anything recently that I want to see.

18. What’s the last movie you saw in the theatre?
Sunshine - Shite.

19. What’s your favourite/preferred genre of movie?
I like them all but prefer true life things.

20. What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the theatre?
Snow White.

21.. What movie do you wish you had never seen
I'm glad I've seen everything I've watched, I can have an opinion on them then.

22. What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed?
Vegas in Space

23. What is the scariest movie you’ve seen?
The Elephant Man. Scares the fucking crap out of me. In fact I've only ever been able to watch it in three sittings.

24. What is the funniest film you have ever seen?
There are loads. I couldn't name just one.

Round 3 today

Massa has warned Hamilton that if he tries to overtake him at the start he'll push him off the track!

That's what we like in Forumla 1 drivers.... White van man!

Go Lewis!

I love the Hippo!

Derren Broon is a twat.

The blonde haired guy sent to Marakesh was obviously (and badly) acting.

The League of Gentleman guys were in on it. Sadly.

The american guy on the phone is just a poor 18y/o sap who was easily pushed by the power of suggestion. (And no, fuckers, I don't mean all americans are before you start slagging me off!)

The whole programme was as fake as my 14" cock!

Wanker!

Oh and "Cheating Death" on Zone Reality... Your experiment was flawed you bastards. You can't use any of your results without recreating the same scenario and you didn't. All you did was drop a skeleton covered in ballistics gel out of a helicopter. NOTHING like what actually happen. And as for the guy that didn't actually fall.... you are not a stuntman, you were a thrill seeker. You fucking twat!

Oh good fucking morning!

I've seen the future and its fan-fucking-tastic!

Max and Huw (the cats) and walking around like Frankencat.

Actually Max is the one walking like he's been fucked by a horse for six hours, Huw is currently sleeping upside down. Quite literally. He sat on the windowsil, closed his eyes and his head fell forward. His body followed at a steady pace until his backside is up the air and his head and shoulders* are and on the surface. This is the position he is still in.

The reason?

They have both had their hoo-hars chopped today. No more nights on the pull... well actually they can still go off on the pull but they'll be no more Maxittens or Huwittens.

*Do cats (and other four legged animals) have four shoulders?

The guy with no shirt on... even I could do those moves!!

It is difficult to turn your back on something that grabs hold of you and commands your attention. People tell you it’s wrong, some tell you that you are wasting your life and your initial reaction is telling to fuck off, it’s your life after all, but a little part of you wonders if they are right.

You start to get an annoying voice in your head that makes you question everything you’ve believed in over the last sixteen, nearly seventeen years, yet still you can’t just turn your back on it.

I’ve blogged about this issue before and slowly, as things move on in my life, I’m finding the issue coming up more and more. I know I’m supported by Brad and my friends, on and off here, but there is currently no one who can fully appreciate how it makes me feel. No one I know anyway. I can’t go to those who should be offering me support because they are the ones I’m concerned about and should all this in my head just be “cold feet” as it were then the offer and opportunities I have will be withdrawn until I’m clear again… I’m not already… which I think I am, apart from this one issue.

People have ridiculed me in the past, and still do now, for the things I believe in and I don’t blame them. The press and main stream media have little understanding of how these things work and will do what they can to sell papers or gain listeners and viewers. One thing these people don’t see is how much help and support I got and continue to get.

You know, as I’m writing this I’ve realised I’ve lost the point of the post. I did have one when I started but now I’ve forgotten what it was.

I was toying with the idea of not posting this but two things occurred to me.

- I have written it so it must be blogged or it’s just a waste.
- I am a blog whore. I must the smallest most insignificant thing.

Am watching the re-run of The Apprentice. Was that young man really driving while holding the phone?

On national telly?

Back to work tomorrow.

I want more time off.

*sigh*

Cock-juggling-thunder-cunt wanker fuck shite.

fuck FUCK F U C K

Right now, I fucking hate kids!... no... one kid!

Started with three hours of this on Thursday...

Friday saw this...

Saturday saw this...

Sunday saw this...

Monday (today) sees another three hours of this...

They've found the body!

Spending my life in the car!!!

Wales to Birmingham again today!

Three hours...

Tick tick tick...

So off I went to the vets with Huw.

He was already looking perky this morning so I was a little happier. During the journey from home to the vets Huw did a lovely green shite in his cat carrier. The stench was disgusting.

Parked up, clean the shite and took him into the vets.

The vet only had to wave the thermometer in front of Huw and he darted for his box. We grabbed him out and I held him as the vet shoved it up his backside.

His temperature is lower but still not right so the antibiotics from yesterday had done some work but the vet decided he’d need another injection.

Yesterday when Huw had his injection he just lay there and took it. Today was a different story. He couldn’t move as the needle went in as the vet had hold of him but once the needle was out he ran in to his box, turned and faced the vet and hissed! And hissed! And HISSED!

I can honestly say I’ve never seen Huw so angry, bless him.

We’ve got tablets to give him for the next seven days and the vet wants to see him if things get worse.

So there we have it, things look better.

Thank you for all you comments yesterday.

I’ve had enough. Who is with me? I want the government out. I’m not on about getting an e-petition together. I don’t minding signing one but I won’t be using one until someone can show me some proof that they actually work, but what I do want to do is something proactive.

I’ve just read Stephs blog. A blog I read quite a lot but don’t comment all that often as I don’t feel qualified enough (in thoughts not education) to comment all the time on some of the subjects she raises but even I don’t have enough knowledge of a subject Steph certainly does and she always seems to research her figures.

Anyway after reading Stephs blog and seeing, once again, what a pathetic fucking joke this government is I think it’s about time WE (you, me, everybody – cue Jake & Elwood) did something.

I want the labour party out of power!

I do not want to conservative, the lib dems, the green party, UKIP, Veritas or any of the other shitarsed politicians in power either. They are all crap. They all need to live in the real world and stop battling to be the most powerful! They are not Romans overthrowing the people and making sure they rule the world… they are people… who are crap!

So fair people of Blogland and anyone else who reads, who is coming with me?

I’m totally serious about this. Give me ideas, give me things we do, the governments sucks and needs out. I have lost my faith in their control, even after the nice things I said about Blair the other day, he’s still said he’s leaving. If you know someone is leaving and doesn’t want the job then do you still want them to stay? Isn’t a month’s notice enough? Screw him; screw the lot of them!

I propose Steph for PM! Nick for the Home Office, Maddogs for the Foreign Office, LyndLJ as the chancellor, Zeds would have to be more than just a press secretary even though it is an ideal post for him; I just can’t think what at the moment. CJ for education, Subbers for the arts, Andy for defence, Jake for technology, Helen for trade, Sam for health, MJ for transport… I could go on for a while filling the spaces but it’s up to you… it’ll be your government after all.

Bad fucking day, bad fucking government. Come on people… what shall WE do? Pass this on, ask your friends, who will join me?

Last night Huw, the cat, came in with a bit of a gammy leg. He’s always been a bit lame in his one back leg but last night it looked decidedly worse. He’s also been looking rather thin lately so a trip to the vets was in order.

I was the only person there with a cat, everyone else had dogs and one woman had a Bullmastif that she couldn’t control.

Finally we went in and German Rob, the vet, gave Huw the once over. Huw wasn’t too pleased when the vet shoved a thermometer up his back passage and his face and eyes told me that he really wasn’t happy and that this hole was for out-calls only!

The vet said nothing about the leg but looked at me very solemnly and said that Huw is very sick and the next twenty-four hours are touch and go. He gave him two injections, one anti-inflammatory and a huge powerful antibiotic. He said Huw is dangerously dehydrated and I need to take him back to the vets tomorrow morning.

So, I paid and headed off to work, with the Huw in his box.

Walking into work Brad asked what the verdict was. Now keep in mind that I hate these two cats. Yes, they are loving, and yes they come and sit on my lap and curl up and go to sleep and yes they are very cute but I hate them…

As soon as I went to answer Brad all I managed to get out was “The vet said it’s touch and go for twenty-hours…” and then burst into tears.

Great!

Anyway, Huw is still in his box, fast asleep after having some milk and some Cornflakes and we’ll see how things go.

I think this is a big hoax!

Brad thinks it's real.

I refer the jury to April Fools Day and free broadband through your water pipes!

Who is he?

I'm having huge issues about Gordon Brown.

I have no problem with Brown being the leader of the Labour party. It doesn't matter to me because I'm never going to vote Labour. Well, I say that, I'm not going to vote for them in the next election unless they drastically change some of their policies.

My problem is that Brown will automatically become the Prime Minister.

When I vote I have my way of selecting who gets my X. First off I look at the people standing for election. I look at what they can personally do for me, my family and my community. Then I look at the parties and decide which party as a whole can do the most for me, my family and my community. I hope that the two choices are the same. Finally I look at who might become the Prime Minister and try to decide if they are good enough and strong enough to run this country for me.

Now all that might appear quite selfish but at the end of the day it's my vote and voting is something I believe very strongly in. I can't abide people who don't vote and then want complain. If you don't vote don't complain BUT, as in Brewsters Millions, I do think there should be a "None of the Above" option and should that option get the most votes then the area should be governed/lead/whatever you want to call it, by either an amalgamation of all those standing with representatives from each local community or by just the local residents as a whole. This way EVERYONE has option to vote for.

But... I would never have voted for Brown to be my Prime Minister so while going through my choice and I find that the Labour Candidate gets my first two options but Brown isn't the kind of person I think could run the country or even the kind of guy I want as the leader of the country, then I would have to rethink my first two things as I wouldn't want to vote Labour.

Am I making sense so far?

Anyhoo... I didn't vote for Labour in the last election but was happy for Blair to be PM. In my opinion Blair has done a good enough job. I know he has people who knock him and yes, in some ways he's been crap, but on the whole I think he's been a pretty good leader for this country. We all make mistakes, it's just unfortunate for him that his are going to be in the public eye and maybe just a little bit more severe that others.

If Brown is the be the next leader of the Labour Party then so be it, let the Labour Party make the decision about that but if he is going to be the next Prime Minister then I'm afraid I want a say in that! It's my country after all, and no, I don't mean that in the way I usually would, what with me being the Queen and all that.

So I nipped out to our garage earlier... and seconds later came running back in...

"Brad, Brad the mountain is on fire!!!"

Last week we notice they'd started burning the gorse on the opposite mountain to us. Well today they did ours. Only it got a little out of hand... the point where four fire engines turned up and the fence of one of the bungalows went up!

So we grabbed the camera... and thought we'd share...

A little while ago Subbers did a blog entry with a link to a website in it. The link sent you to a website that allowed you to convert files into different formats. Well it's easy enough to convert pictures once you're in a photoshop type piece of software but videos are a different matter. Not all software will convert stuff and those that do often come at a price and are shit. With this site you can also take a You Tube link and grab the video. It's bloody fantastic!

Well Zamzar do it all for you and it was Subbers who put me on to it so I just wanted to say...

... because I've used it a helluva lot!!!

Cheers Subs x

He got caught out...

He came running into the lounge...

"Quick quick... go to Google's home page! You can get FREE BROADBAND through you water pipes!"

The look of glee on his face was so sweet, but it was nothing compared to the look of horror as he realised it was April 1st!

Bless him!